What I Want I Get
by kiss me im famous
Summary: Manny wants Craig but he is back with Ashley.Will she go so far to get him back?
1. Default Chapter

Chapter 1- The Begging

I envied her so much. He became friends with her like that in a snap of a finger ....they now talk and I've herd that they want to get back together. Why must she do this...and yet everyone blames me..for what he did..because everyone listens to her...you know if she had given him what he wanted I never would have...and I wouldn't have gotten pregnant and I wouldn't have been thought of as the school slut. So now she's gonna get...she's gonna get it real bad.

School ended at around 4:00 and I was at my locker...J.T. of course (So Annoying) comes up to me and says "How's my little bugger" "Fine" I say giving him the most cheesiest smile you can imagine "He is so gay" oops did I just say that out loud "Who's gay" "No one...um you called last night." "Yeah...did you hear Craig and Ashley are back together." WHAT...I heard rumors but I didn't know it was true of course J.T. was happy and rubbing it my in my face because he now knows that I can't get back with Craig 'This can't be happening' I thought I wanted to just punch him for telling me. "Really where did you hear that" I said acting dumb "Oh Craig...called me last night to tell me " "Cra...Craig called you?" "Yeah he did..he sounded really happy saying she was the one" 'The one what the hell does that mean' "I was supposed to be the one" I said really loudly "What?" "I was supposed to be the one for you" I lied "Do you know what I don't care about..Craig and Ashley I have you and nothing in the world can ruin that " I lied again twice J.T. gave me a kiss on the cheek "I love you " he says smiling I didn't say I loved him I said that nothing in the world could ruin our realatinship..I think he wanted me to say I love you back but I didn't want to I didn't love J.T. he was just a toy I was using for now. I have to get him away think Manny think "I have to go to the library and return a book" Now that wasn't a lie I really have a book to return but I wasn't going to go now..I just had to figure out away to get J.T. away from me. We said our good byes and gave our kisses and I was off home so I could figure out how to separate Craig and Ashley

I got home and jumped on my pink covered bed I called Craig..I had known his number by heart since our first date (892) 549- 3421. Craig answered the phone I was almost about to yell at him but I kept my cool "Hi Craig..it's Manny" "Manny..hi" I could tell he was nervous why because he knows that Ashley isn't the one for him "I wasn't sure but I heard you were going out with Ashley is it true?" "Yeah..it's true" "Well I just called to make sure it wasn't a rumor and I'm really happy for you." Why do I keep lying "Manny?" He asked "Yes Craig" I said "You're not uncomfortable with this whole me and Ashley thing are you" "No Craig...why would I ever feel uncomfertable..I mean....you and Ashley are perfect for each other. " "You think so " "Yeah I do" "Well then I got to go..I'll see you tomorrow Manny" "O.K. bye Craig" and with that I hung up and threw the my pink phone on the ground making the battery fall out on my pink flower shaped rug "I hate her" I said screaming "I hate her I hate her I hate her." I started screaming and pounding my legs and fist on the bed. I have to think of away to get him back. The slut thing didn't work it just gave me a bad reputation...I could get pregnant and say it was his...no that already happend....Oh my gosh I have the perfect Idea

Another day of school went by and I was about to put my plan into work. I saw Ashley walking down the hall wearing her black shirt and her ugly goth pants. I hated her but I had to pretend. I hope all those acting classes when I was 6 will pay off. "Ashley" I said trying to stop her in the hall "What Manny" She replied giving me a cold look. "Last year was last year Ashley..how about we put it in the past...You and me have suffered enough and you got him back anyway and I have my beloved J.T. so how about you and I become friends again...well we weren't before but I think we should be..lets start while getting a burger from the dot..it will be on me." "I don't know Manny" "Please...it will really be making my dream come true." "Fine Manny" she says "I guess it won't be so bad being your friend" "Thank you thank you thank you" I said jumping up a down. I stoppend and we started walking out the door. Things will be better after all and besides what ever Manny wants is what Manny gets and right now Manny wants is Craig.


	2. I Knew It

Chapter 2- I Knew It

It worked I can't believe it worked. I got Ashley drunk...I got her drunk and she spilled out everything. It wasn't that hard...I mean we went to the dot and we had some laughs and then she came to my house. I decided to get us some pops and I added a little to much alcohol to her drink..it was an accident I swear. So this is what happened

" I know that was so funny." Ashley says laughing and walking into my room. "Yeah..I know..when you slapped..Craig..and" I said. Oh my gosh I was so faking it but I had to crack Ashley Kerwin. "You are....a....really....good friend." Ashley said laughing, falling on my bed. "Um....Ash...I'm gonna go get us something to drink." I said and I ran out the room. I go into the kitchen and saw my papa. "Hey papa." I say while looking at him innocently "Hi Mannuela" he said drinking his vodka "You know papa you shouldn't be drinking alot..it's bad for your health." I said picking up the bottle of vodka "You can't tell me what to do I'm the dad your the kid." he said he was drunk I could tell. a) his breath stinks b) his eyes were red and C) he was wobbling "I know papa it's just that I'm worried. " I said looking in the fridge "Well don't be" my papa said and he walks out of the kitchen. I look at the vodka bottle sitting on the counter. I couldn't help myself I mean I wasn't being mean...I just needed to figure out a way to crack Ashley Kerwin. So I did it o.k. sue me I took out a cherry coke from the fridge and I added a little less then half a glass of vodka and mixed it...took out a tray and brought it up to my room.

"Here you go Ashley" I said smiling really big. "What took you so long" she asked me. Think fast Manny "I....was...um....having a conversation with my dad and he wouldn't...let me go?" I said "Oh....well you have a really cute room" she said "Thanks?" I said while sitting in my pink computer chair. Ashley set the tray down and started talking to me about some environmental thing she and Emma were doing..oh my gosh I had already gotten enough of this from Emma I didn't need to hear it again. "Um..Ashley don't you want to drink your pop before it gets cold?" I asked "Oh yeah" Ashley takes a sip of her pop "Woah this is really strong." Ashley starts coughing and puts the glass down. Um..how will I get her to take another sip or finish it. "Um...Ashley...how about I take a sip to see what it takes like" I say I took a sip and started coughing. That was really strong. "No..my pop" She says and grabs it from my hand "This is really good...is there alcohol in this?" Ashley asked looking at her glass. How did she know..how could she tell. "No....why would I do that to you?..you're my friend." I said "O.K...I trust you." Ashley says and she finished the whole thing just as fast as she got my Craig back.

We were laughing...more like Ashley was laughing and I was pretending. "Manny...let me tell you something.." Ashley says looking me in the eyes. Yes she was about to tell me something that I might find useful "What is it Ashley?" I asked looking right back at her. Ashley starts laughing..."I just farted" She said laughing hysterically "Oh my gosh you're almost as bad as J.T." Did I just say that out loud crap "What?" she looked as if she was about to stab me "I said..I'm thinking about J.T." I said.That was close. "Manny?" Ashley said "Yeah?" I said "Now I really have to tell you something..but you have to promise not to tell anyone." she said getting really close to me. What is she gonna kiss me or something or tell me that she burped? "What Ashley?" I asked a little annoyed "Ok..." she started laughing "I don't love Craig" she said now hysterically laughing "I don't even like him at all." she is now on the floor rolling in laughter "The only reason I am going out with him is because 'I hated you'...and I wanted to get you back for what you did to me even though now we're friends I'm not gonna dump him becuase he would do anything for me." What oh my gosh why is she telling me this? That is so terrible but I'm happy now because I can tell Craig and Craig will dump her and I can put my toy back in the toy box and live happily ever after with Craig. "Are you serious Ashley?" I asked her smiling "Yeah but you have to promise not to tell" she said shushing me"I promise" I say crossing my fingers behind my back.

I went to school on Monday feeling happy and ready to watch Ashley fall into pieces once Craig breaks up with her. I saw Craig talking with Ashley they were holding hands he looked so happy..but he's not happy with her...... ..he would much rather be with me. "Hi Ashley...Hi Craig" I said walking up to them "Hi Manny" Ashley said smiling "I was just telling Craig how much fun we had the other day." She said looking at Craig "Yeah fun" I said sarcastically "Um Craigy...I got to go...I have to talk to Mr. Simpson about a project due next week. " Ashley said she gives Craig a kiss on the cheek and walks away. "Isn't she great?" Craig says smiling "Craig we have to talk." I say looking at the ground "I know..I have to ask you something." Craig said looking at me "You do" I said I was breathing really hard was he going to ask me out? "Do you think that Ashley loves me..you know after everything..because I love her...alot...I really think that Ashley is the one...your one of my closest friends tell me what do you think?" Oh my gosh why why did he do this to me...he can't love Ashley he has to love me....now I really have to tell him what she told me but I can't because he's so happy with her..no I'm gonna tell him..but I can't he said he loved her. I started tearing up. "So you lo...love..her." I said starting to cry. "Yeah..I do..whats wrong?..you wanted to talk to me?" "I..wanted....to...to...to...tell...yo..you...that...Ashley...told...me..." What was I going to tell him? The truth that Ashley doesn't love him.... not even like him she just wanted to get back at me. But I couldn't do that to my beloved Craig. "What did she tell you?" he asked me. "She...she...said....that...she loves...you" after I said that I turned around and ran...I ran really fast...and I didn't stop not even when J.T...was at my locker with roses.

I ran outside the school and started crying how could Craig do that to me. Ashley doesn't even like him...but why couldn't I tell him..why was it so hard to tell him the truth when it was right there at the tip of my tongue. I heard foot steps behind me and I started to wipe my tears with my sleeve. "Manny whats wrong?" it was J.T. why wouldn't he leave me alone "Nothing" I said getting up "Are you sure?" he said walking up to me I turned around "I'm fine." I said and I walked past him and went in the school. I saw Craig and was about to turn around but he grabbed my arm and stooped me. "Manny..wait...there was something else I had to ask you." he said he was so hot I couldn't leave. "What..Craig" I said looking at the floor. "Today..I have to babysit Angie and Ashley can't be there I don't want to be alone so do you want to baby sit with me...I mean Joey will pay you." Craig said not letting go of my arm. I should go because this would be a chance to get Craig back. "Yeah I will"

I was at Craig's it had been so long since I was there. The last time I was there was when I had given Craig is Christmas present but I didn't get mine in return. Angie came running to the door screaming out my name. "Manny Manny...Manny your here." Angie was so annoying but yet I had to get along with her because she was Craig's sister. "Hey Angie." I said and gave her a hug "Lets play..lets play...lets play." Angie said pulling on my arm "Later o.k.....where is Craig" I said looking around "I'm right here" Craig said walking into the living room with no shirt on. "H...hi Craig." I said looking dazed..I couldn't help it he was so hot. "Hi Manny....sorry" Why was has he saying sorry..I mean it's not like I hadn't seen him with his shirt off before. " Angie spilled her drink on my shirt and it was the only clean one I had." Craig said. "Ok...I brought my math homework...I don't get it." I said holding up my back pack. "O.K." he said gesturing me to go into his room. "Angie if you need us we're in my room o.k." Craig said pointing his finger at Angie pretending to scold her. "O.K. Craig" she said putting on the t.v.

Craig's room was so warm and cozy...I jumped on his bed and opened my back pack. "Algebra" I said "I hate Algebra" "So do I " he said pulling his chair closer to me. I looked at Craig... he was..smoking...he was hot...on fire....and everything I would have wanted in a guy and more...no flaws at all. "Craig" I said "What if A likes B but B likes C and C doesn't like B that much?" What was I talking about that wasn't algebra that was how I felt "What are you talking about...I knew you would feel bad about me and Ashley you're A and I'm B right" he said looking at me "No...I don't feel bad" I said looking down at my math book. "Manny look at me do you feel uncomfortable with me and Ashley." he looked at me....I didn't say anything I just looked at Craig his beautiful black hair that used to be shaggy is now straight and shiny..his eyes are so beautiful...I couldn't resist..I committed a sin thou shall not commit adaultry....but I did...I kissed Craig...I thought he would push me off of him but he didn't we started making out and right when he was about to take off my bra...he stopped...and got up "I can't Manny...I have Ashley" he said I started putting on my shirt and looked at Craig "Why do you like her?" I asked "Why do I like her...what are you talking about..why wouldn't I like her?" he said looking at me angrily "Because she doesn't like you." I yelled and ran down stairs.


	3. This Will Work

Chapter 3- This Will Work

I didn't mean it...I didn't mean to do what I did....It was all an accident....after I told Craig...he well....just read....

I can't believe I did that I'm so stupid...I wasn't supposed to tell even though I didn't see his face I know he looked shocked when I told him. I was sitting on the couch while Angie slept on my legs and I was watching...the Simpson's. "Do you still need help with your math homework?" Craig asked me. I turned around he had a shirt on no he looked so hot with it off . "No" I said looking back at the t.v. "Angie fell asleep." I said combing my fingers through her hair, she really needs to comb her hair..it has a lot of knots. "Manny lets talk." Craig said to me. I wasn't in the mood for talking...unless it involve him taking me back. "There's nothing to talk about Craig" I replayed back. "Manny it's o.k. for you to be jealous of me and Ashley.....I know you like me a lot but you can't lie about something like that just so I would dump Ashley and go back with you...Ashley and I love each other like you said...we can still be friends though Manny" We can still be friends that word stung in my ears...but he didn't believe me thats what hurt me the most. I started to tear again...I hate it when that happens. When I start to cry in front of Craig..I'm trying to show him that I'm more mature...and then here I am crying in front of him. "You don't belive...me..." I said trying to hold my tears back. "No Manny I don't" he said putting his hand on my shoulder. "Don't touch me" I said moving away " I have to put Angie in her bed" I said as I picked up Angie and put her in her room.

I have to figure out someting...I thought as I was pacing back and forth in Angie's room. I could...Oh my gosh I got it I know exactly what I'm gonna do to Ashley Kerwin to make Craig forget about her.

3 hours later Joey dropped me home he only paid me 20 bucks and I baby sat for 4 hours. So when I got home I started to strategy my plan....I won't be proud of what I did...but I won't really feel guilty. I knew my papa had a gun somewhere in the room so I went in there when he was in the bathroom and I took it out of his drawer. "Mannuella is that you." he asked he was drunk again I hate my dad so much. "Yeah papa I'm here..I just came to tell you I'm going for a walk." I said and I left the room

I was so scared of what I was about to do...but thats what I had to do to get Craig back. I walked to Ashley's house it's not that far. Her parents and Toby weren't home they went to a councilor with Toby's mom they have a lot of problems in there family. I was wearing my mittens even though it was like 500 degrees outside. I could hear Ashley's music playing really loud. It was some stupid goth music. I walked in through the door. "Mom" Ashley yelled..she started to come down the stairs but I hid..so she shrugged and went up stairs.

I went into her room and stood at the door "Hey" I said. She jumped "Oh Manny..you scared me." she said "Yeah I thought I should visit you" I said still standing in there. "At ten at night" she said looking suspicious "I had to tell you something and I wouldn't have been able to keep it away" I said still standing there "O.K...shoot me." She said starting to get up and sit on her bed "I'm sorry.." I said tears starting to come down my face "For what...you didn't tell Craig did you" she asked looking really mad "No..I didn't" I said...I lied.."But I'm so sorry..Ashley" I said now about to bawl I was so scared with what I was about to do. "Why are you saying sorry?" Ashley said she was really mad now..."Because I did this to you." and with that I pulled the gun out of my pocket and shot her...she started to bleed a lot and I shot her again because she was scurming..no matter how much I wanted to turn around and walkaway I couldn't because then she would tell everyone I shot her. She finally looked like she was dead and I left.

But I heard the door opening and I saw Toby's face...I panicked I hid the gun in my pocket and started to cry. "Manny what are you doing here?" Toby asked I didn't say anything because I was trying to cry. "Hi Manny..." Kate said "Did you come here to visit Ashley?" she said putting her coat away "Kate I was supposed to hang out with Ashley today..and I came because she told me she left the door open..and when I came...." I was bawling "O.K. Manny calm down what happened." Kate said trying to calm me down. "Ashley was dead" I said falling onto the ground bawling. "What?..." Kate said as she ran into Ashley's room "I am so sorry Kate if I had come here earlier.. she would have been o.k....it's all my fault." I said and I ran out


	4. I'm So Sorry

Chapter 4-

Great...I am so happy..that I did that now I will be Craig's shoulder to cry on and he'll definitely take me back. I hope...I started to cry as I went to Craig's locker. I had to seem like I really cared about that freak.

"Craig...I am so sorry for what happened to Ashley the other day." I said squinting my eyes making it seem like I was crying. "Oh Manny" he said while giving me a hug "She's dead" I said..yes I started to get some tears. "It' o.k." he said I backed off of him. Since when is it o.k. for your girlfriend to be dead. "Are you serious" I said wiping away my fake tears with my just manicured hands. "Yeah she's not dead...she's in a comma isn't that great." he said giving me a hug and picking me up in the air. "I mean that means that she still has a chance of living " he said with a smile "Yeah great" I said patting him on the back. "Craig..I got to go...home...you know...my dad..needs me." As soon as I said that I ran out of the school.

I got home "Papa" I said out of breath. Yes he wasn't home..:so I screamed really loud. I'm so mad..Craig doesn't even know why I need him..he doesn't get why he means so much to me...he wouldn't understand why I would do anything to get him back. I need someone to love me right now...a man not a boy like J.T...I need someone to love me because right now....I'm the only one giving out love. After I had my abortion my mom left...she left us....saying she couldn't handle me...and that our family had to many problems. After my mom left my dad started coming home late....and drinking....and hurting...never mind ....but now I have to take care of him...it's more like I'm on my own. Because his sorry ass won't do a damn thing. After I caught my breath I ran to my room and dropped my back pack on the ground and opened my underwear drawer thats where I keep all my privet or important things and looked through it. The first thing I saw was my cutting device well it was the inside of a mechanical pencile..you know the sharp part but I only used it once because I herd thats how that Ellie girl relives her pain but it just made it worst for me...I grabbed my cigarettes and my 'coke' and jumped on my bed. I don't consider my self a drug addict but it's the only thing that keeps me sane right now.

"Fuck...I am in so much trouble" I said while lighting my cigarette. I stuck my head out of my window and started smoking because my papa hates people that smoke..and if he found out I did he would kill me. "What am I going to do?" I asked my self while starting to cry "What the hell am I going to do " I shouted again "God please answer me...I need you right now." I said and I threw my cigarette out and shut the window. I'm in so much trouble...I wanted Ashley dead if she gets out of that comma I'm going to be in so much trouble because she is going to tell them what happened. I didn't feel like sniffing so I put it back. And jumped on my bed. And fell asleep

I had the scariest dream...I was in a dark room crying alone...you couldn't see anything all you could here was me crying. When the door suddenly opened and Craig came in "Craig" I said bawling he walked over to me and slapped me really hard...worst than my....and he dose it....never mind about that..but it hurt a lot. "Craig why did you do that?" I asked now kneeling down and sobbing in my hands "Why did I do that?!?!?!" He asked angrily He walked out and brought a body...it was Ashley's she was bloody and her face was messed up and she was still bleeding it looked gross "because you took my heart out and stomped it on the ground. " he said "You hurt Ashley...I knew you weren't OK with us but you didn't have to do this to the love of my life." he said now kneeling on the ground with me and crying "Craig I did it for us" I kept on repeating to him " I did it for us" I said out loud and then I woke up panting with sweat and tears on my face I looked at the clock and it was already 11:00

I went into the bathroom and took a shower...when I got out I looked at my self in the mirror and started to scream my face was all cut up with what seemed like knife markings ..and..and then Ashley's face came to the mirror "I'm going to tell...I'm going to tell..I'm going to tell everyone what you did to me bitch." she said and then she was gone and I looked normal again.

The next day Craig asked me to come to visit Ashley's so we could pray for her or something and he said he would take that shift so her parents could go take a shower and do there normal stuff. I said yes because I was going to be with Craig. I met him there and he was talking to her so I didn't want to disturb so I stood by the door way. "I am so sorry this happened to you." He said crying "Ashley come back to me please...please" he said now resting his head on her stomach "I need you right now Ashley..your my world...I love you...." He said bawling his face was red and you could see the saliva when ever he talked. "I didn't think what I did would affect him this much" I said out loud shit I hate when I do that Craig looked at me "What did you say?" he asked "Oh I'm sorry for disturbing you..I said I didn't think what happened to Ash..would ...affect us this much..." I said while walking closer to Craig " I didn't say anything because you were having your bonding moment with Ash...ley" I said sitting down next to him "Thank you for coming..I didn't want to be a lone " he said smiling at me. I bet it was a cheesy smile...because it didn't look like a Craig smile but hey it worked. "Anytime" I said

We sat there for about 3 hours talking and praying...and playing...and ' crying ' and stuff like that. Craig and I were talking about how cute Marco and Dylan looked together when we herd a moan "Ashley" Craig said looking at her "Craig" she managed to get out "Ashley..is that...you...your here...your awake." he said now starting to cry from joy. Shit...she can't see me she'll tell him..and he'll hate me with a passion so I got up and walked over to the door way again."Ashley who did this to you" he asked looking in her eyes with concern "It was.." she started to say but then she coughed. "It was.." Then the the beeping thing slowly started to stop beep...beep....beep..."Ashley baby hurry tell me so I can go kick there ass" Craig said starting to cry beep....beep....beep..."It was..." she started again beep...beep....beep...beep...............beep..beep..beep...beep...beep..............................."Craig I'm so sorry" I said now really crying because of how bad I felt for Craig. "She's gone Manny" he said crying "She's gone" I ran over to him and we grasped each other "shh.it's all going to be o.k." I said as I rocked him back and forth "It's all going to be o.k."


	5. Whirl wind

Chapter - Whirl wind

I felt really bad for what I did to Ashley...well I feel bad for Craig not that freak. Craig really loved her and he really would do anything for her. I was invited to Ashley's funeral because we were ' friends '.......well actually all the whole school was invited...but I was asked to talk in front of everyone...**everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

Now I would like Craig Manning to come and say a few words." the priest said I started to clap but Emma then nudged me "Ow...what are we not supposed to clap at funerals" I said rubbing my arm "Shh..." Emma said looking straight at Craig "Hi my name is Craig Manning and I was Ashley Kerwin's boyfriend. Like every couple we had our problems....but we don't need to get into that...but Ashley was always their to support me even threw our roughest times...when my dad came back...when I had troubles with a certain girl....Ashley was my heart and my soul and I would never forget her...thankyou" Craig said and he walked away. "Thank You Craig" The priest said "And now our last person Mannuela Santos" He said I walked up to the alter "Ashley Kerwin..." I said "She was a great person and I will never forget her the end" I said really fast winked and left and walked back to my seat...Then the priest said some things and blessed some others...and then it was over!

We went to Ashley's house after the funeral to show some remorce...remorce my butt. But hey Craig was their..."So Craig....you must feel horrified since you were there when Ashley died." I said..while scratching my leg...my dress was really itchy "Well..." He started but Paige interrupted."Oh Manny...I'm sorry didn't you hear this is a funeral not a night club...you were supposed to wear black..not pink. " she said while eying me "Well Paige...hun..this is the darkest out fit I have I'm not goth ...and it's not pink...it's magenta...get your colors straight." I said and I turned back to talking to Craig. "Do you know what I have to go do something up stairs." Craig said and he ran up stairs. Crap I didn't get to talk to him..stupid Paige. "Craig" I said but Emma grabbed my arm and stopped me "Let him go Manny" she said "Boo you hore" I said as she lost her grip.

So Craig was gone for about half an hour and I was getting curiose..of what he was doing. "So yeah...I think this will help the environment in some way." Emma said "Oh god..." I said crossing my legs "I really have to go to the bathroom and Craig hasn't come down yet.." I said looking up at the stairs "Then why don't you go" Emma said "Because I don't want to disturb him" I said "Well go ahead just leave him alone" Emma said taking a sip of her pop. "O.K." I said and I ran up stairs

When I got up there I could hear Craig playing a guitar and I peeked threw the door and he was sing "I don't...know...if....you'll...fo...for...giv..forgive me..." He said sobbing "Fo...for..be..being...so...blind....to....ho..how...you felt." he continued I couldn't stand it he was taring me into with all this heartache "Oh Craig" I said intently to disturb him "Manny" he said wiping his tears with his sleeve I went and sat by him on the bed "A...Ash...Ashley...ga...gave....me this guiter....it...wa...was .....her...grandpa's....an..and..then sh...she...to...took...it back...because...of..what hap...ppend....wi..with...you...and...me" he said sobbing "What..I know...is that everything...I touch.......tu..turns...to dust." he said and started crying some more. "Craig...don't worry." I said yes...this is where I am his shoulder to cry on. I took the guitar out of his hands and laid it on the ground. He started crying on my shoulder and I patted his back "It's going to be o.k." I said I lifted up his head and we looked into each others eyes and started making out. It wasn't right...I know but..still it felt so good.

"I can't.." Craig said he got off of me. "Come on Craig you know you want to." I whispered trying to kiss him again to start another make out session. "Th..This is Ashley's room we just made out in my dead girlfriends room on her funeral" he said butting up his shirt. "Oh..Craig..what difference is it going to make now I mean she' s dead." I say while pulling on his shirt. Then I felt someone pull my hair really hard "Bitch" I heard..and I turned around......


	6. I Can Keep A Secret

Chapter 6- I can keep a secret

"You are nothing but a fake..you don't care about Ashley..you didn't want to be her friend...you didn't even like her....I bet you just became friends with her so you could steal Craig back you slut." Paige said while letting go of my hair. "Ow...... Paige what are you talking about? " I said " Ashley hasn't even been dead for a week ...and you are already trying to seduce Craig into making out with you''. '' Paige said in tears "Paige...I'm not seducing him." I said while pulling down my shirt. Paige slaps Craig "And Craig your nothing but a loser...I bet you're happy that Ashley is dead so you can go back to that...that...slut..'' '' P...p... 'Paige" Craig said stating to cry '' Your not a good friend....and you certainly are not a good boyfriend." Paige said in between sobs "Get Out "she screamed "But Paige...you don't understand..Craig didn't" I said trying to let Craig stay their I mean it really wasn't his fault. "Get out" She said pointing to the door "Paige listen" I added "Get out..before I tell everyone what was going on in here." She said while sitting on the bed.

Craig and I left I wanted to save me and Craig the embarrassment. "Craig I am so sorry." I said as we got out of the house. God I kept on messing everything up..I wanted Craig but it seemed like every time we were together I wasn't getting anywhere things were always messing up :( . " It's o.k. Manny....I was stupid I shouldn't have..." he said "No Craig..it was my fault...I shouldn't have lured you into doing that........it was bad of me..." I said this time I was actually telling the truth.We were walking together to who knows where "Do you know what...let me take you somewhere." He said "O.K." I said I didn't know where we were going but as long as I was with Craig I was o.k...we walked in silence all you could hear was our foot steps and the wind whistling.

We stopped at a graveyard..and we walked over to a gravestone it must have been Craig's mom because it said Mrs. Jeremiah. "Craig..why are we here?" I asked not trying to be rude but I was kind of scared. Craig laid down vertically the way the body would have been underground. "When..I lived...with...my dad." Craig started. I sat next to him "When I was living with my dad and when he would beat me...whenever I was scared...or I wanted to run away I would come here and lay exactly how I am now..and just stay quiet for what seemed like 2 seconds but really it was an hour and ask my mom what to do and we would talk silently not vocally" he said. To tell the truth I really was scared...what does he talk to ghost. "Really?" I said trying not to be mean "Yeah..and I never told anyone this till now..because I thought they would think I was crazy" he said looking at me I laid down next to him and I held his hand. We looked at each other "I don't think your crazy" I whispered "And I don't think your a slut" he whispered back. "I don't think your a slut either....I mean." Craig started laughing and I did to. It was one of those Kodak moments...that you could never forget. Craig then looked the other way "God..I miss her." Craig said. O.K. who is he talking about there are two dead people Ashley and his mom "When I was younger about 7 or 8 ....my mom would take me to dairy queen ever Sunday to get an ice creme sundae and we would sing you scream I scream we all scream for ice cream...before we could get our ice cream cone ....and when ever we got back we were always late and my dad would be worried..and would tell me to go to my room....." Craig paused "And I would be able to hear screams and yelling and I would keep on singing that song...i scream you scream we all scream for ice creame....over and over louder and louder until the yelling and screaming stoped...then I would hear a door slam." Craig stopped again...I could see tears coming down his cheeks "Craig you don't have to continue if you don't want to" I said I to was getting tears because of how sad the story was..."I would open the door..and go back downstairs...and see my mom kneeling on the ground and crying in her hands....once in a while she would have a black eye...most of the time bruises...finally my mom filed for divorce when I was 9...and she wanted me to come with her...but the court said she wasn't in a stable scocity...and she didn't want to tell them about dad because he had money and he would be able to take care of me finical but not emotionally and physical the way my mom did.......so I had to stay there....and then...the ice cream stoped...but instead of my mom feeling the pain I did....he woul...he would always find ways to get me in trouble so he could beat me for the pleasure of it. So when I was in 8th grade I tried to get into as many school activities as I could to stay away from home...and then I found the photography club and loved it...next year I came to Degrassi and you know what happened after that." Craig said "Oh Craig...I'm sorry " I whispered rubbing his hand with my finger.."I have never told anyone this Manny, the only people who know are me...my mom...and my dad..." he said "Well I can keep a secret." I whispered and he didn't reply back it was just quiet I looked and his eyes were closed I bet he was talking to his mom..that still gives me shivers..so I closed my eyes and fell asleep.

I woke up by Craig's wonderfully voice. "Manny...Manny wake up." he said shaking me and I woke up "Isn't it beautiful" he asked pointing to the sunset...It was beutiful...really pretty."It is beautiful Craig." I said It was pink and purple and red...he took out his camera and took a picture of it. "We should get going I hope our parents aren't worried." he said getting up "Yeah" I replyed getting up also my new magenta dress had dirt marks on it I just have to throw it away or give it to charity. Craig walked me home and we stopped at my door. "Thank you Craig...I had a nice time" I said "Yeah me to" He said "Well...what...you..told me I won't tell a soul." I said showing him my hands "No fingers crossed." Craig started laughing "Well bye Manny" he said "Bye Craig" I said I opened the door got inside and shut it. I was happy because what just happened wasn't something I messed up on..but I still feel bad for Craig..


	7. A Day Never To Forget

Chapter 7- A day never to forget

I was so happy of what happened between me and Craig the other day. I guess he trusts me now...or I could just be his rebound..but I well I would prefer he trusts me. But ever since then he was the only thing on my mind...and I really wanted us to go to the Dot together to get some smoothies but English was taking to long.

"So Mannuela what happened in the fifth chapter of the story My Brother Sam is Dead ?" Mrs. Kwan asked. I couldn't hear her I was in a daze of me and Craig "Hello Mannuela" she repeated again Then Emma nudged me I hate when she does that. "Craig Manning" I replied some people started laughing well manly everyone except for me Emma and Mrs. Kwan. "Mannuela I know you think that boys are the only thing right now but keep that to your self. " Mrs. Kwan said and turning back to the board and writing crap no one understood down. Craig Manning the name was so sexy so hot...I just loved saying. It wouldn't stop popping into my head no matter how hard I tried to think of that dumb book we read.

Finally class was over and Craig was at his locker. I won't asked stupid like in 8th grade when I was going fast on him and I won't be committing any sins because I mean he doesn't have a girlfriend...wait shoot....I have J.T...that's next on my list. So I walk up to Craig "Hey Craig...how was your day mine was great..even though Mrs. Kwan hadn't taken her chill pill...so um...today how about we go to the Dot and get some smoothies it's on me....o.k...that would be great..." I said..shoot I couldn't stop talking. "Um..Manny.." he started "Oh and you know what happened yesterday it's o.k...I won't tell like I said I can keep a secret even though before you thought that I had told Ashley that we were together when I told you..." I stooped my self I always talk allot when I'm nervous. "So yeah how about some smoothies." I asked "Ash...I mean Manny I can't." he said.."What is there another girl because if there is I totally am going to go punch them right now...you want to break up don't you even though we never were going out... I mean we were friends and I thought we could be...Craig how could you? " I said I was really nervous "Manny why are you nervous?" he asked "I'm not nervous why would I be nervous" I said "Of course I am nervous are you kidding me I am talking to the hottest guy on Earth I men I just want to rub oil all over his body...." Shit I did it again I really have to learn how to talk in my head "Um..I'm going to pretend I didn't hear anything." Craig said. I looked at him "I..I...mean..I was thinking...and...the...it..came out of my mouth" I said slowly "I'm sorry" I was nervous and I just blew it I blew it I always blow it. I stood there in silence for about 2 minuets o.k. more like 2 seconds and then I ran..I just embarrassed my self "Manny wait..." Craig said running after me...I stopped at the park because I was to tired to run and it was like 40 degrees outside and my coat was slowing me down.

"Manny" Craig said out of breath "The reason I couldn't go to the Dot with you was because..." Craig said I walked over to the swing I didn't' want to hear it...I didn't' want to hear the whole we are just meant to be friends thing...I herd it enough from to many guys. I sat on the swing and pushed my feet back and forth in the wood chips. "Gee you run a lot" he said sitting next to me on the the other swing. "Craig.." I said looking at the ground "It's o.k. you don't have to tell me the whole we should just be friends thing I understand" I said tears coming down my cheeks . He lifted my head with his finger "God your pretty even when you cry" he said I pulled my face away "Craig stop your only making it worse for me." I said "Manny I said can't go to the Dot with you today because I don't want to rush into anything..." he said here it comes the we should be friends. "But..with you there are some acceptations." he said I could tell he was smiling because I felt the Craig vibes I started to smile myself. This was the first time that Craig ever asked me out. I wiped my tears "Your not playing a joke on me are you?" I said Craig got on one knee and pulled out a box from his pocket "Mannuela Santos...born August 15, 1989...who's favorite color is pink..and best friend...is Emma Nelson..." he said with a smile "Yes Yes" I said "Will you be my girlfriend." he asked opening the box. it was a beautiful Tiffany bracelet I don't know how he could afford it but it was really cute. "Yes I will Craig Manning" I said while jumping on him and pushing him to the ground. we kissed and then just laied there me in his arms the way we were sup post to be years ago when I was in 8th grade...and now I didn't have to go for what I wanted he came to me...and I was happy and in love. "I love you Manny." he said kissing my forehead "I love you to Craig" I said snuggling in with him.


	8. The Surprise

Chapter 8- The Surprise

So Craig and I were officially going out. 15 hours and 59 minuets ago. I was so happy I was at my locker getting my stuff ready for the day when..

someones hands went over my eyes. "Guess who?" The person said in a mysterious voice. "I know who it is..." I said putting my hands over his "Then who is" the person said again "Oh Craig" I said the person turned me around and I was ready to kiss him until I didn't feel any lips on mine..so I opened my eyes shit...IT WAS J.T. as in THE J.T. THAT WAS ON VACATION FOR A WEEK...MY BOYFRIEND J.T. "J.T. your back so early " I said nervous. "I was just playing on you baby I knew it was you" I said smiling "Hey honey bee "Craig said pushing J.T. away pretending that he didn't see him and giving me a hug. VERY ACQUIRED MOMENT HERE "Why are you calling my girlfriend honey bee." J.T. asked "J.T. wow your back.... you mean my girlfriend...right? he asked "J.T. my sweet loving boyfriend that was gone for 2 weeks on vacation in L.A. can I talk to Craig for a moment..in privet..." I said through my teeth "Sure" he said "Thank you it won't take long" I said while winking at him and I pulled Craig away from him.

"Manny what is he talking about...you haven't told J.T." he asked looking over his shoulder "Well...um...no...not....really...but...I was going to trow when he was supposed to come back...I was totally surprised I thought he was you." I said "Well your going to have to tell him sooner or later." he said looking worried I bet he thought that I wanted to dump him. "Why the hell would I dump him when..." Why do I keep on doing this "You were doing that thing when you thinking but you say it out loud. You don't want to dump J.T. do you you want to dump me." he said sadly "No Craig..No...don't ever say or think that....I was thinking that you thought I would want to dump you so I said why the hell would I dump him when we were going out for 15 wait now 16 hours and 8 minuets." I said smiling "You remember the time" he asked smiling I bet he was happy now. "Yeah I remember the time that was one of the most happiest moments of my life. " I said smiling "How about this I go to my locker and you break it down to him." he said "Thats a great idea " I said grabbing his hand. "Bye Craigy" I said walking away "Bye Manny he said and he walked away to his locker.

Great now I have to tell J.T. I don't want to break the poor guys heart..but I have to I must. "Sorry to keep you waiting." I said while walking over to him I held both of his hands in mine. I touched his face. it was sun burnt "Wow your really red." I said smiling "Yeah their is a lot of sun down their" he said taking my hand off his face. "But it still hurts when you touch me sun burn." he added. "Oh...sorry" I said how am I going to do this..um..."J.T...this is going to be really hard for me..." I started I think J.T. knew what I was going to say "I've only been gone for 2 weeks and...." he said starting to tear up "Don't cry J.T...it will only make you burn more on the inside and the out ..." I said wiping his tears with my finger. "I'm so sorry J.T...I just wanted...... I hope your o.k...you know...with it being over between us..now." I said "Yeah it will be fine..." he said wiping his tears "I'll be fine...I...promise it's just my sun burn hurts because I'm starting to tear up...but it's not because of you it's because of the sun burn." he said trying to force a smile. I felt so bad...I had been hurt before by Craig and I had promised I wouldn't do that to anyone but I guess I had to. I gave him a hug and a kiss on the cheek and said "See you in English." and left him there alone

I felt terrible just terrible and I couldn't even look at Craig the whole day or J.T. so I had to hang out with Emma and Liberty the **whole day!!! **because Paige won't talk to me. But at the end of the day I went to his locker. "Did you tell him...?" he asked crossing his fingers "No..I'm sorry Craig it's over." I said looking sad "Oh..okay.." he said shutting his locker...and he started walking away..I think I saw some tears falling down his face...I slowly walked up to him and jumped on his back..."Guess Who" I asked covering his eyes I jumped off his back and he turned around to face me"What are you doing you said it was over." he asked looking confused "Craig Manning...since when am I ever serious." I asked "Wait...there is times when I'm serioiuse...like right now...I'm seriously in love with you." I said and I jumped on him and wrapped my arms and legs around him and we made out for what seemed like 2 seconds when it really was forever. "Mr. Manning, Ms. Santos...this is a school not a night club...save that stuff for latter." Mrs. Kwan said I got off of Craig and we held hands walking out the door. "So how about some smoothies?" I asked him smiling.


	9. The Guilt Trip

**Chapter 9- Guilt Trip**

Christmas was coming and I was gong to spend the weekend at Craig's. Emma and I were going Christmas shopping I had already gotten Angie Joey and Caitlin's gift so all I needed was Craig's.

"O.K. I got everyone's gift except for Craig's " I said while walking into hot topic "O.K....but Manny I'm scared to go in there " Emma said stooping me from stepping into hot topic "Are you kidding me...so am I" I said looking into her fritend eyes "But I can't be scared since I'm going in there to get the love of my life his Christmas present." I said smiling "Ah words from the future Mrs. Manning. " Emma said sarcastically "Shut up" I said while slapping her arm. And then I pulled Emma into the store.

"Manny...I'm tired." Emma complained "We've been in here for hours." she wined "And that cashier keeps on winking at me and keeps on asking me to try on really slutty outfits." she adds. "Oh Emma...stop complaining...I'm still looking for the perfect present...for my....oh my gosh this is perfect!!." I said We rang it up and left the store. Mrs. Nelson dropped me home. And I wrapped Craig, Angie, Caitlin, and Joey's gifts.

I was in my room packing my backpack for the weekend when my dad barged in. "Mannuella why are you packing clothes into a backpack?" he asked me looking mad"I am going for the weekend." I said trying not to look at him "Where are you going...I hope you are not going to the boy who caused your mothers leaving...hat is his name...Carter" shoot if I told my dad where I was going he would have killed me. "No..papa..I am going to...Emma's house..this weekend." I said while packing more clothes "Oh Mrs. Nelson..the one who encouraged you to have a baby since she had hers at such a young age." he said "Papa that is not true...she didn't encourage anything." I said starting to walk over to my closet "Then why did you go to her instead of me and your mother when you thought you were pregnant." he asked I stayed quiet "Answer me Mannuella" he said I could see the veins popping out of his neck. "Because"I said why was he doing this to me he always does this to whenever I want to go have fun he wants to ruin it. He is putting to much pressure on me by asking all these questions I mean I just killed someone and then here is my dad acusing me of doing something I didn't do. I just couldn't help but cry."Because I was scared of how you were going to react..I was scared that you would have abandoned me....I knew she would have been able to tell me what to do because she was in the same position as me before...." I said in tears "Shut up.." he said "You are not going anywhere this weekend." he added "But papa your not being fair." I said crying. I could feel the tears burning down my face. This is why I needed Craig..he would have understood where I was coming from...the abusive father thing.. I zipped up my backpack and wiped my tears. "Papa..I'm going..for the weekend to Emma's house." I said trying to stop my tears and walk out the door. "Your not going anywhere" he said he grabbed me and pushed me on the bed and then everything went black.

I woke up and it was about 4:00 p.m. I got out of bed and looked at myself in the mirror. I had a black eye and a little cut on my lip..nothing that cover up couldn't fix. When I was done making my self look preaty. I grabbed my backpack and snuck out through the window. I walked to the Dot and called Craig to come pick me up. Spinner gave me hot chocolate and said it was on the house he is so sweet. Craig came in and one of the worst days of my life was actually getting better. "Hey Mannuela" he said while waking in he was wearing the black and green GC shirt I got him...but he was stupid and wasn't wearing a jacket. "Hey Craigy..you look cold you want me to warm you up." I asked while giving him a hug. "Sure" he said squeezing me tighter. "Your really warm." he said "I know" I replied he gave me a kiss on the forehead "Um..Craigy...Manny..this is a public place save that for your house." Spinner said "Sorry" I said Craig and I stayed at the Dot for an hour. "So are you ready to leave?" Craig asked me "I'm ready when your ready" I replied back.

"Joey we're home" Craig said while walking into the house. "Wipe your feet so we don't get snow in the house" Craig said. Craig's house smelt like ginger bread cookies "Hi Craig..hi Manny" Caitlin said while walking into the living room to greet us "Hi Caitlin" Craig said "Hi Caitlin ...You guys are making gingerbread cookies aren't you" I asked smiling the smell of gingerbread cookies made me think of my mom..we would make them all the time even if it wasn't christmas "Yeah we are." she said smiling God her teeth are white. "Manny...Manny....Manny" Angie said screaming and running down the hall "Hi Angie" I said giving her a hug. "Who is this for" She said pointing to the gift right in front of me. "Well I don't know do you want it?" I askedd smiling . I really am starting to like Angie..she reminds me of me when I was younger. "Yeah..I want it and I want to open it now" she said jumping up and down "I don't know you'll have to ask your dad." I said "Dad" Angie said running back inside the kitchen "That Angie" Caitlin said laughing "She's a handful" she added "So Caitlin when did you get back" I asked her..I wanted to start a conversation and it was getting really hot....and I was nervous I mean being around my boyfriends parents scary right. "Well I'm going back New Years Eve I am only taking a vacation. " she said "So Craig..I'm sorry to hear about Ashley" Caitlin said "Yeah..it's o.k...I was very depressed but I'm sure she would have wanted me to move on." Craig said while grabbing my hand I felt as if I was going to puke when Craig grabbed my hand"I have to go to the bathroom " I said getting up and walking upstairs

I went into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. "I can do this..." I said while pacing back and forth. It was starting...something I didn't want to start. I WAS FEELING GUILTY I WAS ACTUALLY FEELING GUILTY FOR KILLING ASHLEY. I have felt guilty for a while but I always pushed it a side. I couldn't feel guilty because I wanted to be happy..and I am happy right? I mean I have Craig..my life is going back on track. But why is this guilt coming on my shoulders. I feel as if I'm going crazy because of what I did. I didn't do anything wrong..no I didn't I was doing it to be happy...and as long as I'm happy I did nothing wrong...Craig is happy to. I took one more look at my self and walked out. I can do this..I kept on saying in my head.

I walked passed Craig's room and saw allot of pictures on his wall. All of them were of Ashley and Craig..or just Ashley ..non of me...non of them were of me. :( Maybe Craig isn't happy with me...maybe he misses Ashley....maybe we just weren't meant to be. No snap out it Manny you and Craig are perfect for each other. "Manny...we are about to read some Christmas stories" Joey yelled up the stairs. "I'm coming" I yelled back "Your Mannuella Santos and you can do this" I said to my self. and walked down stairs.

Everyone was laughing and having fun except for me. I kept on thinking about Ashley and how I killed her and ruined her life..and made things miserable for her family and practically the whole school...I swear I'm going to say something by accident. I have to go to confessions on Sunday after Church. It was getting really hot in the house...and I was sweating really bad. "Manny?" Joey asked me "Manny" he said again. I was lost..I was in my own world thinking about Ashley. Craig nudged me "I'm Guilty" I said really loud everyone stared at me "What are you guilty for ?" Craig asked me "What are you talking about." I asked very confused I had no clue what I had just said. "Manny...sweety you were crying." Caitlin said. I didn't even notice that I was crying..was I crying because of Ashley...did I really feel that bad...I stooped so low...I could have stayed with J.T. but no I had to "kill her" I am so stupid I said that out loud "Kill who" Joey asked "Oh never mind that sometimes she is thinking and she says it out loud." Craig said trying to make a joke out of it "Isn't that right Manny?" he asked smiling at me "Yeah...right" I said I was feeling really hot and sweaty. "Oh..well Manny what happened to your eye." Caitlin asked What is this two-one questions. I bet I was the tears and sweat caused my make up to fade and they could see my black eye damnit think Manny think. "Lets open presents." I said cheerfully trying to change the subject "Yeah..yeah presents" Angie said jumping up and down "O.K. lets open gifts " Joey said "Open mine first " I said to Angie handing her the princess coverd box "O.K." she said she opened the box "Wow..." she said "It's a Barbie karaoke set." she added "With a built in Microphone." I said smiling "Thank you Manny" she said jumping to give me a hug

So we were opening gifts for about an hour. I got a book about fashion design from Caitlin, hair stuff from Angie, and really cute pink shoes from Joey. Now Craig was about to open my present. "Wow..it's a...guitar pick..." he said I hope he was happy with it. "Yeah and it has a picture of that band you like" I said "Kiss" Craig said. I gave him a kiss on the cheek "Why did you want me to give you a kiss?" I asked confused "No that's the band." Joey said. "Oh" I said smiling that was so embarssing. I think Craig was trying to look happy..I bet he haited the gift. "O.K. let me go get my present for you Manny" Craig said and he went up into his room and came back down with a box....a big box with wholes in it. I opened it "Oh Craig.." I said smiling about to cry his gift made mine look like crap. "It's a chuaua " I said smiling "Oh my gosh Craig" Caitlin said "How could you afford this?" she asked "It's a long story" Craig said smiling at Joey "Oh my gosh Craig it is so cute....I'm going to name her tinker-bell." I said showing him my white teeth "I love you Craig" I said while giving him a hug he smelt like really bad after shave but oh well as long as I'm with him I'll get past it. "Anything to please my Mannuela" he said I got off of him. My papa says that to me I picked up Tinker-bell and ran out of the house. "Manny..what did I say?" Craig said while running after me.

I was sitting with tinker-bell outside not to far away from the house and I could hear Craig's footsteps. I was crying and it was like icicles where forming on my face. God all this is hard for me I had problems about what happend with Ashley and then when I had already forgotn about what happend with me and my dad he had to remind me of him. Why..Why was everything going wrong when it was suppost to be going right. I HATE LIFE "Manny whats wrong what did I say?" he asked me sitting down next to me in the snow...this guilt thing I hate it so much. "Craig..I ruined everything..." I said crying "What do you mean?" he asked looking confused "I ruined your life...my life...my dads life...Ashley's life....everyones life." I said bawling "What are you talking about." he asked still confused. "I killed Ashley" I said crying..shit I said it "What do you mean you killed Ashley" he asked I think he was about ready to slap me. Think Manny think..."I didn't come early enough..and if I didn't talk to Emma for half an hour and gone to Ashley's she wouldn't have been dead." I said crying "It's o.k. Manny" he said hugging me"It's all going to be o.k." he said while rocking me back and forth "No it's not.." I kept on saying over and over again.


	10. He Loves Me Not

**Chapter 10- He Loves Me Not **

After Christmas I didn't go to school for a week. I felt terrible for what I did to Ashley...so I told by papa that I was ' sick ' with the flu. It's not like he cared anyway because all he cares about is himself and getting some every now and then if you know what I mean. My dad is a sick nasty man but anyway. Why is it bothering me now..like 3 months after she was gone. I felt bad..I felt like filth...I felt as if I had to be washed no matter how many times I took a bath I just felt dirty. And now Craig was acting different. I mean he would talk to Paige allot in the halls and whenever I went over they would stop talking.

It was Febuary..and I was at the Dot talking with Spinner and Paige...I apologized to Paige and we became friends again. We were having a double date and Craig was late obviously. Paige had to go the bathroom and Craig walked in. "Hey Craigy..you look cold do you want me to warm you up?" I asked him while giving him a hug "No not now Manny...Spinner have you seen Paige?" he asked while pushing me off of him. "Yeah she just went into the bathroom." I said coldly. Why would he care were Paige was. Paige came out of the bathroom "Hi Craig" she said giving him a hug..**why wouldn't he push her off of him!!!!** "Hi Paige " he said squeezing her tighter. "I'll be right back I have to tell my boss I'm going on my break" Spinner said while walking away. Spinner went on his break and we got our selves a table.

Craig kept on looking at Paige. But it wasn't the friendly friend way it was the way you would look at someone when you wanted to go do crazy things with them. I know that look because he gave it to me many times last year. "Craig..hunny is there something on my face what are you staring at?" she asked with a confused look. "No..sorry I was spacing out." he said smiling with his big yellow teeth. "So Craigy can you come with me to get another soda for us" I said really fast "Manny..hun...are you nervous." Paige asked me with her red devilish eyes. How Come Everyone Knows When I am NERVOUS. YES I AM NERVOUS YOU ARE ABOUT TO TAKE AWAY MY BOYFRIEND FROM ME!!!!!!"No..I'm not nervous." I said smiling. After I noticed Craig staring at her she started looking evil I don't know why? "O.K. Manny" he said and we got up and went to the counter. "Two sprites, one coke, and a diet coke please" I said giving the waitress our glasses "O.K. " she said I looked into Craig's eyes "I know what your doing..and it's not working" I hissed at him like a snake getting ready to eat his prey."What are you talking about?" he asked "You know what I'm talking about you bastard. " I said "Here's your drinks " The lady said "Thank you" I said while giving her a really cheesy smile. I think she could tell because she didn't smile back and she started to mumble words. "Craig" I said about to tear up..I could feel my eyes burning. I know Craig would go for Paige and I know Paige is getting kind of sick of Spinner so she obviously would say o.k. to Craig so many emotions. "Manny once again I have no clue what your talking about. " he said pretending to look confused "Do you know what....how about this...you and I go drop our drinks off and then we go have a little 'chit chat' outside for a couple of seconds o.k." I said smiling "O.K." and I grabbed our drinks and went to the table

"Craig and I have to talk outside for a bit o.k." I said smiling "But my break is almost over." Spinner complained "and.." I said waving my hands trying to get him to say his point. "And...we haven't talked this whole time.." he said looking disappointed "Yes we have...I said quote Isn't that funny spinner? unquote and you said quote yeah Manny!!! unqoute...see thats talking." I said trying not to be rude but I really had to talk to Craig. "Well..." he started but I interrupted "Well great now lets go Craig..see you later Spinner...and we'll be right back Paige." I said while saying Paige's name really coldly

So we got outside and Craig tries to give me a hug but I pull away "Don't even try to act like everything is okay Craig." I said I was really pissed "Craig?...what ever happened to Craigy?" he asked me looking confused "I don't know you tell me" I said really angrily with my arms crossed trying to hold back my tears and my fists. "Manny I am so confused whats wrong with you...first you call be a bastard and you tell me to cut it out and now you stopped calling my Craigy whats wrong" he asked trying to touch my arm but I pulled away. Karma is a f-ing bitch. Why why did it have to happen to me. "Craig...you keep on doing it over and over and over." I said starting to cry I couldn't help myself "Doing what?" he asked starting to get angry himself "You keep on hurting me Craig." I said with more tears coming down my tan face. "I keep on telling my self no but for some reason I have an urge to talk to you..to want to be with you....to do anything to get you back" I said bawling "Manny how am I hurting you." he asked me acting stupid key word stupid. "Don't play dumb with me I saw you looking at Paige..and it wasn't friendly it was the I want to go and have sex with you look..how do I know this look because you have given it to me before....and I hear you guys whispering all the time now..like in the hallways and when I come over you always stop talking and change the subject.." I said with the tears going away and the angriness coming "Lis..." he started but I interrupted "Listen to what...how you love..Paige...how you want to be with her...how you care about her more then you care about me...what was I Craig your rebound.?" I asked angrily "Man.." he started again "Don't Manny me...Do you know how hard it was to break up with J.T....I felt terrible Craig...I felt like crap...I know what it feels like to be dumped and cheated on because you were the one that gave me those experiences." I said now turning red I swear steam was going to come out of my ears. "Manny listen to me." he said while grabbing me "Craig get off of me." I said trying to squirm my way out but at the same time it felt so good to have his hands on me so strongly he was the man not me..he should take control. "Manny do you know what tomorrow is?" he asked me "Febrary........14" I said looking at him like why does it matter. "Do you know what tomorrow is?" he asked me "Yeah..Valentines day..." I said slowly "But what does that have to do with...Paige.." I asked angrily I didn't want to loose this fight I hate loosing fights. "Do you know what else tomorrow is?" he asked looking into my eyes it looked like he was about to cry...and I didn't want to feel sorry for him he was supposed to feel sorry for me. "Think Manny think" he said looking me in my eyes..February 14..what happened February 14 "4 months ago" he said now I did see tears in his eyes. O.K. lets go back...Janruary, December, November, October..."October 14th was....Oh Craig February 14th is our 4 month anniversary. " I said about to cry of embarrassment. He took his eyes and his hands of me and looked at Paige through the window Paige looked at us confused and mouthed whats wrong.I shook my head and she smiled and turned back to Spinner and Craig faced me his face was now pail white and it was all my fault. "Paige was helping me figure out away to make your day ultimately cool because it was Valentines day and our anniversary" he said looking pretty sad. "Craig I am so sorry." I said looking down at the ground "No now... it's my turn to get mad." He said starting to turn red "You didn't trust me why.." he said "Bec..." I started but he interrupted me. "I never would have cheated on you Manny...and I never would have wanted to hurt you in anyway or form." he said "I.." I started but once again he interrupted me. "Why couldn't you trust me?" he asked but I didn't answer I just looked down at the ground "Why didn't you trust me?" he asked me again . What does he want me to say something or will he cut me off again. "I don't know Craigy I'm sorry" I said really quietly "Can you please give me another chance" I asked still looking at the ground. "Manny" he said "You couldn't trust me and I felt really hurt about that....you need trust in a relationship...and if you don't have trust in me..how am I supposed to have trust in you." he said very quietly also and then he gave me a hug a really tight hug and then let go and looked at me "So does this mean you'll take me back?" I asked him waiting for a yes "Manny...I'm sorry but you hurt me by not trusting me it's over." he said and he looked at me and I looked back at him tears filling in my eyes and I turned around and just ran home.

I saw my dad sitting on the couch and ... I just ran up the stairs and locked my door. I opened Tinker-Bells cage and grabbed her and sat on my bed. I just cried..cried my heart out and I started singing my favorite song when I was sad from the sound of music. **_"...These are a few of my favorite things..when the dog bites when the bee stings when I'm feeling sad..I simply remember my favorite things and then I don't feel so bad" _**My life was going down hill "My life sucks tink" I kept on saying over and over again while falling asleep "I ruin everything"


	11. My Life Is Not Worth Living

**Chapter 11- My Life is Not Worth Living**

So there goes my life. **First** I kill someone **Second** I am going to go to jail **Third** my boyfriend dumped me **Fourth **my dog is starting to stink up the house **Fifth **my dad is getting worse if you know what I mean. and **Sixth **it is the one year anniversary of the death of my baby. God I won't press charges if someone killed me right now I would have considered it a miracle. Because my life is a living hell anyway. 

I stood in the hall way. The now cold dark hallway with no life....no joy....no point of being there. J.T. walks up to me...Tinker-Bell starts to move around in her carrying case but slowly stops. I figured he was o.k. with what happened between us and I guess he just wanted to be friends anyway and he wasn't ready for the whole girlfriend boyfriend thing you know. And I was fine with us just being friends to because right now I really needed a friend since I had non again well I had Paige but and her crew but whatever. While I was standing there I started to cry because Craig was talking to Paige. Oh Yeah did I tell you there going out. I know right....I told you Paige was tired of Spinner so once Craig told her what happened between me and him they became an official couple funny huh.

"Manny whats wrong" J.T. asked while looking at me with his dark brown eyes. "Yo..you wouldn't understand." I said tears streaming down my eyes. "Shoot me" he said That only made me feel worse because Ashley said that right before I shot her. "Have you ever loved someone so much that you would do anything to get them back." I said looking him in the eyes the tears going away "So much that you would kill someone just to get them back. " I added "Manny..." he started "Exactly..you don't understand" I said while walking away "Are you sure about that" he whispered. Oh My Gosh did J.T. really love me? Oh well I doubt it and I don't have feelings for him anyway.

"See you later cutie pie" Craig said while walking over to his locker "Bye hunny bee" Paige said while blowing him a kiss "Hi Craigy" I said while waving my hands while Craig was passing me. He stopped and walked up to me with a smile....and I smiled back and his smile slowly faded...."It's Craig" he said patting me on the back and he turned around and walked away. Tinker-bell started to bark but I shushed her. "Tink..we're trying to win him back not scare him away" I said while whispering in her ear. "I know right..he's so cute..so adorable.." Paige said while walking next to me...Tinker-bell started to growl. I knew what she was doing trying to make me jealous I knew she never liked me anyway. "I mean isn't Craig the cutest Manny" she said while smiling at me trying to show Craig off in front of me just like Regina George did in mean girls...except it was working for me but I couldn't give in I couldn't let her win. "Yeah he's cute....but I've seen better." I said smiling. She gave me a big smile "What?...." she said looking confused she saw that it wasn't working on me. "I said that I've seen better." I said while shutting my locker I could feel Tinker-bell jump. "Oh" she said while walking away she turned around. "See you at lunch Manny" she then winked and walked away. "Bitch" I whispered

"So Manny what happened I saw Paige talking to you." J.T. said while we were getting our lunch. "Chicken..." I said to the lunch lady "She was showing Craig off in front of me o.k. now stop talking about it." I said while paying for my food. God J.T. was doing it again following me everywhere. It's not like he likes me anymore so leave me alone!!!!!! "Um...J.T. I think I hear Toby calling you." I said trying to get him away from me. "Oh" he said and he walked away "Thank God" I said and I walked over to Paige's table. "Hi Manny" Paige said while I sat down next to Hazel "Hi" I said while grabbing my fork. "Hey Everyone" Craig said while sitting next to Paige. "Hi...Craigy" Paige said while giving him a kiss on the cheek. "So Paige...when's our next Spirit Squad practice?" I asked her trying to get her off of Craig "It's on Monday like every other practice" she said looking confused "Oh.well...I forgot ....you know me." I said smiling "No we don't " Craig said while looking at me coldly. God with him sitting there I started to feel uncomfortable. "Well then most of you know me" I said trying to make a joke out of it. God I felt stupid..really stupid. Once again I was acting like a idiot. Tinker-bell jumped out of her carrying case and walked over to Craig "Eww get that thing away from me" Paige said while getting up from the table "It's not a..." I started "It's not a thing it's a chuaua and it's name is Tinker-bell " Craig said while looking at me and handing me the dog. "I know this because I got it for Manny for Christmas." he said looking away "Um..Craig can I talk to you about something......now" I said starting to get up.


	12. Just Friends

Chapter 12- Just Friends

What I was saying was true. This time I wasn't trying to make him feel bad I really had to talk to him about something.

"What is wrong Manny? Did you see me with Paige and think I was cheating on you even though we arn't gonig out." He said starting to sound annoyed. "No" I whisperd starting to tear up. What I was feeling realy hurt. It wasn't about Craig leaving me. It wasn't about Paige showing him off. It wasn't even about my dad. It was about me. "Then what is it." He asked annoyed but with a little remorce. have been 7 months old" I whisperd with tears coming down my face. "Whad do you mean...what are you talking about?" he asked I am sure he knew what I was talking about "Alyssa...Alyssa, she could have been 7 months old.... I could have had her in July." I whisperd with more tears comeing down my eyes. "Our baby...she could have been crawling and saying mama and Craig." I whisperd again while holding onto my stomach. "Manny...I know it was a year ago today but...we have to move on like nothing happend." he said trying to touch my shoulder but stopped himself. "Move on...move on..Craig how the hell could I move on.... Our baby is dead and I'll never see her again how the hell am I supposed to move on from that." I said out of anger "Oh yeah...I forgot...you wern't there...you wern't there to see your baby..your own flesh and blood die. " I said staring to get annoyed I mean how could you forget about something like that "You wern't there to see them stab a pair of sicorsrs in it's head...I forgot you didn't feel the pain of what it was to see your baby dying." I said trying to stop my self from yelling. "Manny...It's not my fault that you had an abortion." he said trying to get himself out of it. "Are you sure...I mean Down Town Sasqwatch was going to be huge ....right?..well how could they be huge if there lead singer had a baby at the age of 16 ....I'm sure a lot of teenage girls wouldn't want to crowd all over him. Oh and Craig...Mr. Studd of the school you can't cheat on two girl at the same time when you have a baby in your hands can you...exactly." I said now angry " Manny you could have raised the baby yourselft." Craig said " Which one sounds better school slut or pregnant school slut ." I said starting to cry. "Manny your taking this seriously." he said trying to act like he cared "No..Craig...I finally got to see the real you...I'm okay now..... all I want you to rember is that it takes two to tango." and I left.

I bet that got Craig thinking. I mean how dare he have the nerve to say to my face "It's not my fault you had an abortion." Not my fault my ass. God he is really starting to get annoying but yet I still want him back. It's kind of like a slice of pizza you no that if you eat it your going to gain a lot of calories but you still want it anyway. We wegre sitting in homeroom durning study hour and Liberty came on with the announcments. I totaly zoned out on everything until I herd those harsh cold words. "And don't forget to pay for your ticket for the Valentines day dance." she said and it seemed like she said it a lot it kept on poping in my head the rest of the day. How could I foget about the Valentine's day dance I mean it's one of the biggest dances of the year. And I wasn't going to have a date.

I got home and I smelt febreeze and candles so I walked out of the house to see if I was a the right house and I guess I was so I went in. I walked into the dining room and saw two chairs and candles and a wine bottle. "Papa" I said really loudly and Tinkerbell started to bark. I shushed her. "Hi Mannuela." He said while coming down the stairs. "Whats the occasion" I asked while pointing to the dining table. "Oh..I'm just having a lady friend over." he said smiling "Her name is Charleene" he said smiling "Oh.." I said smiling "She goes to work with me." He said I was happy my dad was happy you know. I rember Craig made a dinner for me like that. "How about you go to Emma's and do homework" he said "Or you could go to the movies...you know so me and Charleene don't bother you." he said while fixing one of the candles. "O.K. but I don't have money." I said sticking out my hand. "Here" he said handing me a 20 "But bring back my change if you have any" he said smiling at me "But papa.." I said starting to wine "I'm just kidding go have fun" he said smiling. I grabbed Tink and my backpack and left.

"So for the dance do you have a....... are you going with anyone?" I asked Emma while we were buying our popcorn for the movie. "Yeah..I'm going with Chris you know it' s a one time thing since niether of us had a date." she said while grabbing the Mega Bucket popcorn. "Oh." I said while we were walking over to the room. "I don't have a....you have got to be kidding me." I said "What" Emma said "Manny...Emma come sit with us." Paige said sitting at the very top of the seats. "Oh my gosh Emma please no." I said pleeding but Emma was already half way up the steps. Emma was sitting next to Paige and it was the only seat left in the corner away from Craig so I had to sit next to Craig. I tried to avoid looking at him but it was to hard. We went to go see the grudge very scary but I wanted to be with a friend like Emma not a ex-boyfriend like Craig. "If you get scared don't be afraid to grab my hand Manny...we can start out fresh as friends." he said right before the movie started I smiled and noded but I was not going to hold his hand I mean ex-boyfriend here. And anyway I didn't want to be a friend I wanted to be a girlfriend but friend was better then an enemy.

Sorry about all the mess ups and miss spelling becuase I am terrible speller and they took away spell check :(


	13. Big Mistake

Chapter 13- Big Mistake

All I'm gonig to say is I messed up big time with Craig. :(

"Manny can I ask you something." J.T. asked me when we were sitting on the bus"J.T.can it wait.. I have to figure out a way to get him back in less then 10 hours and 4 minuets..or in other words before the dance. " I said "And your going to help me." I added the bus stopped and I got up. "So I'll save you a seat in English." I said while getting off the bus. "But Manny..." J.T. said "Tell me later." I said and I got off.

I don't know how I was going to get Craig back but I knew I was. I am not going to kill Paige because I'm going to have two deaths on my hands. So I was not going to do anything wrong but it might be effective. Craig was at his locker with out his dog and I walked up to him and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned around and I immeditly kisseed him on the lips. "Now arn't those lips that you would want to take to the dance tonight?" I asked him seductivly smiling "I don't know are they?" he asked me smiling "Does that mean that we're going to the dance together." I asked about to pee in my pants. "I don't know are we?" he asked again. "O.K. than pick me up at 7:00 o.k." I said but I didn't hear a response. I didn't think of hearing a respnse because I was to excited

I was at my locker putting my stuff away. When I felt someone's hand grab my arm. "Manny I have to talk to you now." he said smilng "Ehmygod J.T. guess what." I said really happily I didn't even wait for his response. "Craig and I are going to the dance together." I said jumping up and down "You are?" he asked like it was a shocker. "Yeah " I said confused I mean wasn't he happy for me. "Oh" he said looking upset. Why was J.T. so sad all the sudden I mean..."Whats wrong J.T." I asked now feeling bad but I can't feel bad because Craig and I are going to the dance together. "It's nothing." he said smiling. "I was just kidding around..I'm not sad." he said jumping up and down. "O.K..then" I started "So what should I wear...do you think...pink looks good on me...oh how about green or red crap J.T. I have to go shopping." I said starting to get nervouse so I spoke faster and faster. "Do you know what Manny!!" J.T. asked turning red "What" I asked. He staid silent."So anyway...I have to go to D.E.B. and Sears...." I got inturpted by J.T. again oh my gosh. "Oh my God Manny...you can't go a second without talking about Craig....do you know what let me tell you the cold hard truth...Craig dosn't like you....Craig never liked you.....he was only using you as a rebound. " he said. The word rebound stung in my ears. "He dosn't like you Manny" he said while walking closer to me "And I didn't think that he would say yes to going to the dance with you since he is already going out with Paige." he hissd "Craig does love me." I said starting to tear. "Craig loves me a lot." I added "Or else he wouldn't have given me this tiffany braclet...or Tinker-Bell.....or taken me to dinner....or..." I said but J.T. stopped me again. "Do you get it Manny he was only giving you that stuff so you wouldn't leave him...and the Tiffany braclet isn't real..it's a fake." he said "You were like his prostitute." he said "Is that what you wanted to talk to me about...did you want to ruin my life." I asked "No." he said "Then what is it...what did you want to talk about?" I asked really mad "I wanted to know if you wanted to go to the dance with me." he said looking at his shoes. I bet J.T. made all that up so I would get mad at Craig and go to the dance with him. "Jack ass." I said while pushing him and walking away.

I got my dress it was seductive yet not to sluty It was light pink and it went to my knees the v cut went all the way down to my chest I knew I was going to get Craig back with that dress. I looked great. It was 7:30 and Craig wasn't there to pick me up yet. I was waiting and I sat outside for another hour and he still didn't come maybe there was traffic or something. So I went inside and watched t.v.  I was watching Lauguna Beach. I kind of reminded myself of L.C. you know and Craig was my Stephen and Paige was Kristen. And I fell asleap. I woke up and it was 9 and Craig still wasn't here so I decided to call Craig. "Hello" Joey said "Hurry up Joe...I'm waiting." I herd Caitlin yell "Hi...Joey...this is Manny is Craig there." I asked "No...Craig left for the dance 3 hours ago" he said "Oh...o.k. bye" I said and I hung up the phone. How could he..oh maybe he said he would meet me at the dance at 7:00 so I felt dumb leaving him there and I called a Taxi and went to the dance. I walked in to see if he was there and I looked at the sighnup sheet to see if he had put me down as his date. I skimmed and I wasn't on it was Paige and Craig. I looked in the gym and saw Paige and Craig slow dancing and making out. At that moment my heart brooke in half.

I called a cab and went home. I looked through all my cubbords and found my dads vodka I grabbed a glass and poured it in. I drank it in less then a minuet. "God this feels good." I yelld thank god my dad was with Charleene tonight. I took about 4 more glasses an thought I was about to passout. I was going to get Craig back no matter what. It was about 11:00 and there was one more hour of the dance so I opend my knife drawer grabbed a knife and put it in my purse. I called another cab and stumbled my way into the dance. I found Craig talking with Paige at a table.

"Hi Craig" I said drunkingly "Manny..hi" he said "Yo..you didn't come and get me at seven" I said while stumbling closer to him "You hurt me" I said "Eww...Manny are you drunk" Paige asked "No..I'm not drunk." I said smiling "Yes you are we have to get you out of here." Craig said "Before you get introuble by Raditch" he added he started to grab me but I pushed him off of me. "Don't touch me...don't act like you care about me Craig." I said "I would do anything for you...I would jump off a bridge for you I would even kill Ashley" I said rember I was drunk so everything I said I really didn't want to say "You didn't kill Ashley it's not your fault." he said "Yes it is....I killd her....After you said you didn't belive that Ashley didn't love you...I went home and grabbed my papa's gun and I went to Ashley's house and I shot her twice with my gun....I told her that I was sorry for what I was going to do before so it's not like I'm not sorry...but do you know why I would kill someone just to get you Craig...becuase you would understand me..you know what if feels like to have your dad beat you...and hurt you all the time...the only thing that you wouldn't know what it feels like is that..... my dad rapes me every night...he rapes his own daughter Craig...and you were the only one I would ever feel comfertable talking about that with..and I couldn't talk to you about that stuffif Ashley was always there so I killed her and now she's dead and she will never come back." And then I paused "And I"m not affraid to do it again" I pulled out my knife and ran for Paige but then everything then went black.


	14. Testimony

Chapter 14- Testimony

"So there was my testimony..the whole story." I said "I wasn't proud of what I did...and as you could see I got really sad and depressed but...I needed Craig so much...he was the blood running through my vains..and you can't live if you don't have blood." I said starying to tear up can you belive me just wanting to get one guy could lead to this"Craig would have understood me the way no one else could..but I was stupid and insted of asking him what to do with my dad..I did that to Ashley so I could have him all to my selfish self....so I'm sorry everyone and icluding Ashley's family because I hurt you in more than one way. " I said "Thank you Manny" my lawyer said and I got out and sat down "We are going to have a recess come back in 30 minuets." The judge said. Craig was walking out the door "Craig" I said trying to get Craig to talk to me ever since that night he hadn't said a thing to me. "Go away Manny" he said starting to tear up also "Craig please." I pleaded "You were right Manny...you did ruin everything..you ruined my life...getting me to think that I loved you...you ruiend Ashley's life...by killing her...and you ruined your life..becuase now you might go to jail..great job Manny great job." he said "Craig I'm so sorry." I said in tears.."How am I sure your telling the truth?" he asked "Craig please belive me" I said "Just leave me alone Manny" he said and he left. "Craig" I said in tears.

I went to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror God I looked like crap my hair was icky "Look who you've turned into Manny" I said "Your a murder and everyone knows it. You have ruined your life...your reputation...you have no dignity...." I slapped myself. "Everyone's calling you a phscopathic bitch.....do you know how bad that is....do you know what you did...do you know how you made people suffer." I said in tears "Does Craig..even get how good of a girlfriend you were...you...." "Wow Manny.." Paige said starting to clap "You had a lot to confess...I mean your testimony took like 2 hours. And you relly got into detail..great job..." she added I looked at her with my big brown eyes through the mirror. "Does that mean you forgive me and we can be friends again?" I asked giving her puppy eyes "Hell No.....Your a murder and your giong to have to live with that for the rest of your life." she said walking out the bathroom door.

I got back into the court room. They did there talk talk talk about stuff and then I heard it my verdict what was going to happen to me....."Wow..this..was a very hard case...Manny I am proud for telling the truth and I hope you didn't leave anything out because I don't want to spend another two hours in this court room...." He said starting to laugh "but I am not proud of what you did...you are going to have to see a phscitrist because you don't need to be a rocked scientist to see that you have a lot of problems...but now the jury will tell you your verdict." the judge said I stood up. "In the case of Mannuella Maria Santos we found you........"

**THE END**


	15. Note Thing

Thank you all my devoted fans and I am making a sequal right about now.....so don't worry you will figure out what happens k.

Luv ya,

Cassiesteelefan120


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